Ever had a day where you felt you lacked vitality and energy, had no inspiration to do anything and couldn’t pick yourself up? You may feel as if you’re in a bit of a fog, can’t see through it and want to hide from it. Feeling flat and lacklustre about life makes for a bad day and is difficult to brush off sometimes. I had one of those days yesterday and it was tough, I wasted the whole day not doing much and I had zero motivation. I hid myself away from everything, cancelled things in my diary and felt generally pretty rubbish. However, today’s a new day and I’m taking this opportunity to give myself a pep talk and write this blog so that perhaps it may help others when they’re having a lacklustre day.
First let’s deal with the bad day and how to cope. Recognising when you’re feeling lacklustre is important because then you can put a strategy in place to deal with it. Easier said than done? Yes, definitely. However, even if you have a plan to deal with your lacklustre time and only put one thing in place, it’s a positive change and will help. Over time, you might find that you’re using 2 or 3 strategies and are getting into the habit of doing this – it will all help to make your lacklustre days better. Finding your own plan and strategies is the key, I’m going to make some suggestions, but only you will know what will work for you – if you push yourself to try to do something that you’re resisting, it won’t work and you may end up feeling worse.
So how did I deal with my lacklustre day yesterday? Firstly, I was honest with myself and others. Some people may think it’s easier to make up excuses and not tell others the truth about how they’re feeling, however, being honest about how you actually feel is important – you don’t have to feel guilty about making excuses to cover up how you feel. Being honest about how you feel is acknowledging it and paves the way forward for dealing with it. I therefore acknowledged and accepted how I felt and told myself that it’s OK to have bad days. I let my husband know how I was feeling and he gave me the space that I needed, I also let a friend know when I cancelled our virtual catch up and was very grateful for the support they both gave me.
The next thing I did was to work out what I had to do that day which couldn’t wait, and luckily I had a light day so was able to move diary appointments to other days. I then thought about what I could do which could inspire me and make the lacklustre feeling not as dull. Being a practical person, I like to make things so I decided to make cupcakes (the smell helped to lift my mood as did the look on my husband’s face when I presented him with a chocolate iced cupcake). This really helped me to feel as if I’d achieved something that day and it relaxed my moody mind, where I’d previously felt tearful and concentrated on my resistance to do anything that I felt I should.
Like I said, the strategies you employ to help lift your lacklustre mood are personal to you and may not work for others. So if mindfulness, meditation, reading a book, binge watching Netflix or just having a ‘duvet day’ helps you, then that’s your strategy, it’s all about looking after yourself in whatever way you need.
If you have regular feelings of being lacklustre, you may want to explore why this is. It could be that you’re resisting something fiercely and this is causing you emotional pain which could lead onto physical pain such as headaches. This is where you have to be honest with yourself again, what are you resisting? Sometimes actually admitting this is difficult and painful. However, covering it up will mean that you’ll never resolve what it is you’re resisting and those dull feelings will grow. You may want to talk to someone about it, if you’ve been covering this up for some time actually putting it out there will be liberating.
Tell yourself that ‘tomorrow is another day’ and start afresh the next day. It’s unusual to be inspired and happy 100% of the time so don’t beat yourself up for having bad days, it’s natural to have the odd day like this. However, when it takes over your life, this is a problem and if you feel you’re at this stage I would advise you to seek professional help with your doctor. Never suffer in silence – there is always someone who can help you – remember to reach out if and when you need. And if you would like to talk to me about putting strategies into place when you have that lacklustre feeling, contact me here.
Next month – M is for Misunderstood. Do you ever feel lonely because you’re misunderstood? In this blog, I will share my experience of feeling misunderstood and how I took control back to let people see the real me.